alex kimmell
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you have to read this blog post or you'll die empty and alone

10/15/2012

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Don’t you hate it when you start writing, the words are flowing, the idea is coming together so naturally it breathing its life from your fingertips into the keyboard? Wait wait…wait. That’s not the part that’s hateable. What really blows, what really chaps my hide, what really cinches my nuggets, what really sucka sucka sucks… is when the wonderful beautiful most gorgeous ideas you ever had find there way through the flashing cursor and the program quits before you break through your reverie long enough to press command-S (or Cntrl-S if your on a PC).

I’ve talked about this before. Did I learn my ever-loving-flipping-flopping lesson? (Insert snarky sarcastic tone here) Of course not!

I had a fantastic idea for the first post on my websites new blog this morning. It was going to dazzle you. Embrace your inner geek and cause each and all of you to quickly forward my insightful prose to every person you’d ever known in your entire life. Those you loved, liked even a little bit, cherished and yes, those you hated would open your forwarded message titled:

“The Best Thing I’ve Ever Read In All The Days Of My Life!
No Really!
You Have To Read This Blog Post
Or You’ll Die Empty And Alone
And I Just Can’t Bear the Thought Of That!”

Think I’m exaggerating? Nope. It was that good. Problem is I didn’t save it. So you can’t prove it wasn’t now can you? So I’ll sit here typing away on this subpar jumble of words wiping tears from my once glory filled eyes knowing that my greatness will not fully be realized today by the digital d=streams connecting our world together today.

*sigh*

In all seriousness now, I did start writing a post this morning that I felt pretty good about. The phone rang before I reached the bottom of the second page and when I went to answer it, the program decided to take a shitter on me and the document rendered itself unrecoverable. Not much I could do after that message balloon popped up on the screen besides scream, stomp my feet in a childish tantrum and be angry with myself for not saving the damn thing every couple of sentences.

The good news I guess is that I am writing anything at all. It’s been a rough go for the last few months. There’s been lots of lows, but a couple of really nice highs as well. The book’s been getting some really positive reviews, some great stuff is coming down the pike here in old Key to everythingland (so stay tuned to the website for details) and My friends over at Booktrope have asked me to write a series of short story compilations and a second novel! So definitely be on the lookout for news about those very soon.

And hey, because Halloween is swiftly approaching you better sign up for our contest. That is if you want to be a character in that new book. Plus, don’t we all dream of owning a one of a kind creepy demented possessed crocheted hand made evil squirrel? You know you want one. All the cool kids do!

So send in your terrifyingly true tale of terror (minus the crappy alliteration) and enter the Key to everything Hooray for Halloween Contest!

 Bye for now!

-a

Hooray for Halloween Contest!
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